Monday, March 12, 2012

What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Stronger!!!!

So, appropriately this song is playing on the radio as I drove to my last radiation treatment.  I couldn't have said it better myself.  The surgery didn't kill me, the chemo didn't kill me, and the radiation didn't kill me.  Therefore I must be stronger!  I definitely do not look stronger, I do not physically feel stronger (in fact I feel wiped out and look like a deflated blow up doll!!!) but I am sure I must be emotionally stronger.  I have finished on more regimen of treatment!  I look back and realize what a long ass, ten months this journey (as some people call it) has been.  I am starting to see a glimmer of light ahead.  I have made it through these treatments with the help and support of my wonderful family and friends.  I have learned so much about how much people care.  It is truly amazing.
My radiated side is bright red, swollen and blistering.  It hurts more than I thought but I am learning which creams work and how to manage the side effects.   Dr. Kuske says that's just how he wants it to look!  He is very assured he took care of any lingering cancer cells.  I have faith in him and hope he is right! 
I will hopefully be getting this damn port out soon,  I have an appoint this Wednesday to schedule procedure.  Then get my deflated boob re-inflated.  At the end of month I meet with Dr Wendt (oncologist) to go over and plan for hormone treatment (tamoxofin).  I have read a lot about it, some people have bad experiences others tolerate it well.  I will try it and see how it goes.  Then, exchange surgery in six months (exchange temporary fake boobs for permanent fake boobs!!!) 
I am so looking forward to being back to my old self (I won't say normal!).  I feel like I look at life a bit different now and think this (cancer) has been a huge learning and growing experience for me.  We have a trip planned to Cancun on June 13th with some friends to celebrate my 50th.  I am looking forward to it, and try to enjoy every little thing in my life as well! 
Thanks again.... to everyone.
Love, Sara ♥♥♥

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Strong, Stronger, STRONGEST - that's you my friend. You amaze me! Judy